Dr. Isaac Yankem | Juice Make Sugar: #InternetWrestlingWriting for people who like the circus.

It’s Day Two of #KaneWeek, a celebration of all things Big Red Monster and the ninth installment in our patent-pending Juice Make Sugar Wrestler of the Week series. Yesterday, we started with A Wrestler You Should Probably Know Better. Today we give you the finer points of the Dr. Isaac Yankem oeuvre with some Essential Viewing. We mix things up tomorrow with some Hidden Gems from that very same catalog along with a GIF parade. After Hump Day, we’ll make our “Amazon on Steroids“ dreams come true with Juice Make Sugar Recommends… before finishing everything off on Friday with a Difference of Opinion (where JMS HQ erupts in a Hellfire-and-brimstone fueled civil war.)

Kane posed a weird question for us as a Wrestler of the Week: is it #KaneWeek or #GlenJacobsWeek? Unlike, say, Antonio Cesaro, although his name has changed, “Antonio Cesaro” isn’t as much a character as the name of Claudio Castagnoli in the WWE. Telling the essential story of “Antonio Cesaro” isn’t the same as telling the story of “Antonio Cesaro, WWE superstar”. The idea of an Antonio Cesaro isn’t any more exclusive to WWE than AJ Styles is for TNA: the guy is the character, we just know him by a different name.

It’s not even the same as #BullyRayWeek, where someone — Mark Lomanco — had a character, developed that character and then moved on through the wrestling world using that character with basically the same name give or take a last name.

But, Kane isn’t Glen Jacobs in the way that The Undertaker isn’t Mark Callaway. He is a wholly constructed character that can’t really exist outside of the WWE’s (pardon the pun) universe. Does it take something away from the conversation to discuss “Glen Jacobs” when talking about Kane?

Which brings us to the original problem: is it #KaneWeek or #GlenJacobsWeek? It’s of course #KaneWeek, because “branding”, but if our goal with Wrestler of the Week was only to tell the story that WWE wants you to know, then I think it would be #KaneWeek, and we wouldn’t have spent any time yesterday talking about Dr. Isaac Yankem. But that isn’t the goal. The goal is to learn about the history of these men, not just their characters.

Which is you have to include things like Glen Jacobs appearance at SummerSlam, against Bret Hart:

While not a masterpiece, like a young center who hasn’t quite figured out his low post game, some of the high flying work of Jacobs at this point in his career shows the flashes that would lead them to believe that he could successfully become the “evil” offshoot of the most popular single gimmick in history. This, of course, took a while, and before he could make it to his his first appearance at Badd Blood (which we will get to later), he had to deal with a character that managed to be even damaging than the personal dentist of one the most hated heels in the company: a Kevin Nash impersonator.

For those who blocked out the Fake Diesel run, a few things need to be said, including one from a personal level. Fake Diesel, and his even worse-looking partner Fake Razor Ramon, nearly ruined wrestling for me, creating issues with my understanding of characters, acting and the very foundations of kayfabe. If Diesel and Razor were just characters, did that mean that everything that happened to them was planned out? While it made it clear Jim Ross was lying, and these weren’t the same guys, it never felt like something that needed to be addressed, and came off in the same way that someone becoming the CM Punk “character” instead of Phillip Brooks would.

Thankfully for us, and for Jacobs, this run lasted only a few weeks as everyone had the same reaction I did: this is terrible and needs to stop. With a need to extend the life span of the Undertaker and keep him fresh without changing his character, giving him the title or making new main eventers, they decided to give him the a top-of-the-card type of storyline that he had last genuinely had during his time with Hulk Hogan during the fall of 1991. Even his main event work with Sid for WrestleMania 13 hadn’t really done what they were hoping, leaving them looking to rebuild him into an even darker (and eventually more sinister) entity than he had been previous.

Enter Kane. (Literally:)

After months of claims from Undertaker’s estranged manager, Paul Bearer, Kane arrived with what was essentially a fully formed backstory, and along with the presumption that A) he was as “powerful/big” and B) he was looking for some kind of existential revenge. With means, motive and opportunity, Kane entered our subconscious the way Voldemort did, with an immediacy that required attention.

It was a textbook example of how to make a star instantly, allowing the worker to only need to match expectations to get over. No relationship was required to be built, as this one simply just built on everything we originally knew about the Undertaker. But what allowed Kane to be Fraiser (Cheers) and not The Golden Palace (The Golden Girls) was that they took everything that worked as the subtle charms of the Undertaker — like his “supernatural abilities” essentially being “able to sit up without using his hands” and “turn the lights on with his hands” — and supercharged them for Kane, allowing The Undertaker to not just have a blood reason to feud with his brother but an moral obligation to save the people that Kane was, among other things, setting on fire. Like this poor guy:

This lead to their match at WrestleMania XIV, which while — as will be the case for most of the matches that told great storyline stories for Kane, the ones that “we’ll remember him by” — were technically speaking, nothing to write home about. But it is the genuinely the closest we have ever been or, at least the closest we have ever felt in the moment, to the end of The Streak. From there, Kane would weave in out of the life of The Undertaker for the next few years, going through ridiculous storyline after ridiculous storyline.

Because Andy covered much of this yesterday, the only thing really “essential” to see from this era is the Katie Vick video. And because it’s so over the top and embarrassing, it’s nearly impossible to find, with only this muted version available on YouTube. Below it, we’ve put a video from an interview Triple H did with Opie and Anthony explaining how ridiculous shooting that was, which, if nothing else, should make you appreciate the stupid things wrestlers are willing to do for your entertainment.

While he would have better luck in recent years, it’s not like Kane hasn’t had to deal with his fair share of ridiculousness, like LOSING TO HIMSELF in a feud, but all of that practice working in that part of the wrestling world seems worth it when it produces things like the surprisingly funny — at least for the WWE “Anger Management” sketches that would not only help make Daniel Bryan into a main eventer, but helped cement Kane’s case as a “first ballot” Hall of Famer.

From their time in group therapy

to one of the most brilliant pieces of physical comedy in wrestling history

the work showed the versatility of both men and the ability to, as Andy said, “roll with the punches”.

And, ultimately, that will be the legacy of the character of Kane and more importantly, the performer, Glen Jacobs. While a great worker — which something we’ll get to tomorrow with some hidden gems — the story that Jacobs has told in, around and out of the ring is the one we will remember him by.

It’s the First Day of #KaneWeek, a celebration of all things Big Red Monster and the ninth installment of our (patent-pending) Juice Make Sugar Wrestler of the Week series. As always we’ll start by making Kane a Wrestler You Should Probably Know Better. Tomorrow we give you the finer points of the Glen Jacobs oeuvre with some Essential Viewing then march through Wednesday with a GIF Parade. After Hump Day we’ll make our Amazon.com-on-steroids dreams come true with “Juice Make Sugar Recommends…” on Thursday before finishing everything off on Friday with a Difference of Opinion (where JMS HQ erupts in a Hellfire-and-Brimstone-fueled civil war.)

There’s a good chance you won’t find Glenn Jacobs’ name on too many “match of the year” lists, and you’d be hard-pressed to find a match worthy of that incredibly subjective “five star” rating. In fact, you’ll find just as much WrestleCrap on his résumé as you will quality wrestling.

But when Nick asked me who I thought deserved to be featured next in our (patent-pending) Juice Make Sugar Wrestler of the Week series, few superstars seemed more deserving than the Big Red Machine.

A smart guy inside the wrestling business, and outside as ; regardless of whether or not you agree with his beliefs (I’m a mixed bag, at best), it’s hard to deny he actually knows what he’s talking about. And unlike a certain former CEO with a couple of failed Connecticut Senate runs, he may actually have a future in politics after wrestling. Even if he may have trouble running from his past.

Take his debut, in 1995, as Jerry “The King” Lawler’s private dentist. The Dr. Isaac Yankem, DDS experience was what it was: a green worker given a ridiculous gimmick with a punny name who was — even backed by a great promo and booked against one of the greatest workers in the business — practically set up to fail. If this happened today, he’d be wished well in his future endeavors within six months. And yet, more than 18 years later, he’s at the tail-end of a legendary career with the biggest wrestling company in the world.

He made it through A LOT: being paired up with X-Pac, dubbed “The Big Red Retard,” a horrid unmasking on live TV — complete with fake hair and black makeup made to look like the world’s least convincing burns. Even after Jim Ross pointed out how normal Kane looked, and KANE SET JIM ROSS ON FIRE, Kane stayed over.

Part of that was because Kane started so hot. #ShawnMichaelsWeek should have brought back fond memories of Kane’s debut, ripping off the Hell in a Cell door and starting a literal blood feud with his “brother,” The Undertaker. He had an awesome, bloody program with the Texas Rattlesnake and helped make Mick Foley a household name. If only things could stay so good.

But his incredible run has not been without some serious hiccups. In fact, the fact that Kane isn’t a Big Red Gym Teacher by now is a true testament to his talent and, maybe more importantly, his ability to roll with the punches.

He feuded with a past-version of himself. And lost. Think about THAT.

He overcame that character-assassinating Finger Eleven theme song.

He became a babyface after RAPING Lita and FORCING HER INTO MARRIAGE, stayed a babyface when she miscarried at the hands of Snitsky (BUT IT WASN’T HIS FAULT), and didn’t even managed to lose it after Lita — the woman he raped, impregnated and forced into marriage — left him for another guy.

He even survived Katie Vick.

But survival isn’t what impresses me about Kane. It’s his ability to work with whoever, and whatever, to tell the story and get other guys over. The most recent example of this may be the most significant, and ultimately, the one for which Kane is best remembered.

***

Team Hell No MADE Daniel Bryan. The crowd liked him, and, he was a former world heavyweight champion, but Kane gave D-Bry the chance to show an actual personality, to show that the American Dragon was someone who the fans could REALLY connect with. The difference between being a solid hand in the upper-midcard and a bonafide top guy. Daniel Bryan is a top guy, and he owes at least a little bit of his success to his association with Kane.

It didn’t always work out THIS well for guys paired up or against Kane, but even if The Hurricane was never going to be WWE champion, he got to share some tag team spotlight for a while. And X-Pac enjoyed his last shreds of mainstream credibility as the guy who made Kane talk. Feuding with Kane helped make Edge the “Rated R Superstar.” Lita’s live-TV boob-slip didn’t hurt, though.

And for better or worse, Kane helped launch WWE Films. See No Evil cost about 8 million dollars to make, and brought in more than double that. Not bad for a b-horror movie starring a pro wrestler. And sure, that led to Knucklehead and The Chaperone, but they can’t all be winners.

Kane probably won’t be ranked among the “best ever” or get “one more run” with the WWE title. He might not even have any more great matches. But you know what’s definitely in Kane’s future? A well-deserved Hall of fame ring, following what will surely be an epic induction by his “brother.”

Until then, though, there’s lots to enjoy. There will be plenty of good matches to come against worthy, up-and-coming opponents. There will be some dark and scary stuff. There will be some funny business. It wouldn’t be Kane unless some of it was utterly ridiculous. But you’d better believe that in the end, it’ll all be worth watching.